Inspiration is such a funny thing: little by imperceptibly little things come together. Earlier this month it occurred to me that I would not finish the year with my dear four-turning-five year olds. I have loved those crazy, spunky kids and my endlessly patient team teacher since the first class. I would look across the aisle to the other class of kids the same age and see a rag tag assortment of kids but when I looked at our children it really was as though an additional light shone on them and perhaps a little hum from the heavenly hosts above.
Don’t misunderstand. Most Sundays Kelsey and I went home completely exhausted. They are four and five year olds, after all. But they were our four and five year olds and we had a good thing going. I wanted things to stay.
I lied to myself when I first recognized the feeling that things wouldn’t last; I rationalized that it was because Cruise was leaving and other kids were moving in. I told myself that feeling was the acknowledgement that our super six would no longer remain intact.
Two Sundays ago I looked over the piano at my friend Andrea and thought she was transitioning to YW. The thought was fleeting and very subtle. It was sparked by the unusual situation that she was playing and our pianist was conducting. It was so easy to move on to other thoughts and to forget.
When I received the email on Thursday night to meet Sunday before church my first instinct was panic: I knew Joanna had moved. Once I realized that replacing her would come directly from bishop I relaxed, I’m not yet ready to be president of anything again for a while. Besides, teenage girls terrify me, so outside my comfort zone and realm of experience. Not president, i relaxed. A counsellor then.
Despite my subtle preparations I cried when the request was officially made. The father of one of my beloved students was the one asking. Andrea is the mother of another of my students and she had been the one, the new prez, who had made the request.
We’ve been here for ten months and all has been pretty tame. I guess it’s time to get out of my comfort zone.