Kids Say the Darnest Things (part one)

Laie Elementary After School Program

He explained to me that he wasn’t allowed to have paper “in case I accidently make it into a paper airplane.” (as though he had no choice in the matter.)

Valley Elementary School

“If I ever catch a yankee on my property, I’ma gunna shoot him dead in his tracks.

… that’s different, Mrs. Phillips, you’re from Canada. That’s far enough north that you’re safe.”

Waddell Elementary School

“How old are your kids, Mrs. Phillips?”

“I don’t have any children.” (yet. I’m pregnant and sick as a dog but no one knows yet.)

“But you’re married.”


“Well you know that a man and a woman…”

“Yes, yes, I know how a baby is made.”

“Maybe you don’t. How long have you been married and you still don’t have a child?”

“I took biology.”

“Are you sure?”


6 thoughts on “Kids Say the Darnest Things (part one)

  1. Yes. So of course I had to tell the other teachers at lunch the next day.

    Later, when I finally announced I was pregnant the speech pathologist dropped a card in my box congratulating me. She said, “[he] must have had a feeling about your extracurricular activities!”

  2. That is so funny! My kids (piano student kids) have come up with some of the funniest excuses for not practicing, etc. I love kids. I lvoe how honest they are and how they will say anything (regardless of the consequences.) What a hoot!

  3. oh man, i wish you would have let him give you the down low on how to have babies. i bet hysterical would have racheted up to… killed over dead hysterical.

    the paper airplane thing… that’s a real issue. crazy stuff like that happens all the time … totally by accident.

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