Paging Dr. Freud…

In the past month I have started doing the following behaviours I’ve never really done before:

* grinding my teeth (I have done this before, but never as frequently or as persistently as now)

* scowling (I have to remind myself to smile, I can literally feel the weight of my cheeks being dragged down by gravity)

* holding my breath (not kidding — I’ll be doing the dishes or something equally banal and suddenly realize I’m not breathing)

* kicking Paul out of bed (not steamrolling, but actually pushing him with my hands and feet while in a deep slumber and unaware)

We will not get into the “eating with wild abandon issue” as that goes back to October and is not a new behaviour.  I fully expect all of these physical manifestations of my stress to disappear when Paul gets a new job — but when is that?  And how many more bizzare things will I be doing by then?

3 thoughts on “Paging Dr. Freud…

  1. Luckily I have never had to endure grinding my teeth, but my sleeping partner has. However, scowling and breath-holding and eating with wild abandon, those have all been manifestations of stress/depression that I’ve had to put up with at various times.

    The good news is, making the effort to look people in the eye and smile was really helpful to me. I’m glad you’re taking the same approach. Remembering to breathe is a bit harder, but it feels really good, too.

    You’re not alone. Good luck!

  2. Stress is awful! Especially when it is triggered by finances and jobs! I hope that these don’t overtake you! I can’t believe how strong you are as it is! I was/am hating the world at your point! You are doing grea!

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