Last Sunday I played a solo in church. It felt good to be practicing again, and it felt good to play. I like myself better when I’m playing; my posture is better, my mood is better, my outlook is brighter. I organize my time better, and I make clearer priorities. I am able to reconnect with the person I have been since I was five. It feels good to play.
I didn’t realize it had been so long since I last played in church, but some of the people who used to know I could play, had forgotten. Gil even told me “you’ve been hiding your light under a bushel.” Yikes! So I thought about it, and realized that it had been several years.
I’ve always struggled with doing musical numbers in church. I demand that the piece has enough substance to it that it interests me as a performer, but I often worry that it would be too ostentatious, or – worse – that people will think I’m doing the musical number to show off. This week I was able to see that the music made people happy, and that as I shared my life’s work with others we were all edified. For the first time I didn’t worry about someone thinking I was pretentious. I just presented my offering for everyone to enjoy.
It’s so much easier to get out of the apartment to practice now that the boys are older. I will do another musical number. Soon, I hope. It feels so good to play again.