The Adventures of Anxiety Girl

Anxiety Girl Gets a Ticket

Driving down a road she’d never travelled before, hoping it would lead her where she wants to go (home) she gets pulled over. The officer kindly informs her that she was going 34 in a school zone. She is astounded. She stutters and stammers and shakes and trembles. She had no idea she was in a school zone. The guilt is palatable: she, a PTA mother, had unknowingly sped through a school zone. She spends the entire weekend a step and a half below anxiety attack. Guilt, no matter how innocent, tastes terrible.

Anxiety Girl Visits The DMV

First thing Monday morning Anxiety Girl heads to the DMV to finally face her bureaucratic fears and get a Texas license. The line is long before the doors open but move fast and she calms herself with yoga breathing and people watching. At least the employees are cordial, a welcome change from California. She had forgotten her SSN and had to return home but did so with the forced cheerfulness that at least she’s taking a step in the right direction. When she returns she discovers the computer system is down. Within a few minutes she learns the entire state is down and going to another office would not help.

Anxiety Girl visits the DMV take 2

After deciding that waiting in the lobby of the DMV in hopes the system will be up soon is not helpful, Anxiety Girl decides to wander the local craft store to stay active and keep her mind busy. After an hour, which apparently is the longest period of time she can allocate to window shopping by herself, she called the DMV and discovered that their computers were indeed back online. Hooray! She cheerfully went back and didn’t even let an under the fingernail papercut bother her as she pulled out her papers to check-in. It was only then that she discovered she needed yet another proof of residency deemed nearly impossible as she recently moved and most bills are electronic.

Anxiety Girl visits the DMV take 3

With chocolate courage she rummaged through her papers and found satisfactory documentation. She returned to the DMV pleased that third time would be a charm and proud that she had handled the morning without crying so her photo would not be splotchy and puffy. It was only then, on the precipice of victory, that she was informed she also needs to show proof of insurance for her husband’s car. Tears flow.

Anxiety Girl and the Waiting Game

Anxiety Girl waits for Metro Postal to open to get the fax number. Anxiety Girl waits for insurance agent to return from lunch so she can have him fax her husband’s insurance card to her. Anxiety Girl waits. Anxiety Girl wanders. Anxiety Girl waits some more. Anxiety Girl seeks comfort in the newly-changing leaves. Anxiety Girl seeks comfort in the soft autumn breeze. Anxiety Girl has consumed her candied courage and hopes the sugar high is more powerful than the DMV and the waiting.

Anxiety Girl Visits the DMV take 4

Five hours and twenty one minutes since she first arrived at the DMV she is finally approved to sufficient documentation and given a number. She is number 316. She waits. She is tired and insufficiently nourished. She can see that there will be an eye test. There will probably be more. Will she perform adequately under these compromised conditions? Only time will tell. She settled in to continue her scripture study while she still has battery power on her phone. It is dangerously low.

Anxiety Girl Visits the DMV take 4, part 2

Six hours after she first set foot in the DMV Anxiety Girl leaves victorious. In ten short business days she will have a new plastic card with a terrible picture! Yippee! Anxiety Girl returns home with just enough time to scarf down an ice cream lunch and wash the evidence before her children get home. The anxiety is not over, she still needs to make.a.phone.call to beg for leniency so that she can take the defensive driving course and cut her ticket in half, even though she had an out of state license. The phone call can wait another day. Anxiety Girl has done all she can for a Monday.

3 thoughts on “The Adventures of Anxiety Girl

  1. Oh. My. Goodness.

    I’m pretty sure it’s a Texas thing. Did I tell you my drivers license story? My old license was set to expire on my 30th b-day, but I didn’t realize it until the day before. So I ran to the DMV that morning. I get there and the computers are down across the whole state (must be a TX thing!). I wait, hoping they’ll get fixed. I waited for like 2 or 3 hours until my phone died and they still aren’t fixed. So I go explain my situation to the lady at the front who is checking everyone’s documents when they come in. I tell her that it’s my birthday tomorrow and my license will expire but I can’t renew it today! What should I do? She cheerfully says that it’s ok if it’s expired–there’s like a 3 month grace period so I won’t have to do the tests or anything, it’ll be just like a regular renewal! Well PHEW! So I go home and don’t worry about trying to go back on my b-day. I go back like a week later and they tell me that since my license is expired, now I need to take the written and driving tests. GRRRRRR!!!! WHAT THE HECK?!?!

    So I pass the written test, even though I missed pretty much every alcohol related question–hello, I have NO idea how much alcohol in your system is allowed! I don’t remember things that don’t apply to me lol! But I passed. So then I go do my driving test. I got a new girl who was being observed by a superior during my test so she was CRAZY about every teeny tiny little thing. I flunked within the first 4 minutes of driving. I’ve never gotten a speeding ticket in my whole life, and never caused an accident or anything! And I failed the driving test!!! They even nit-picked about me not turning my head to check my mirrors–um, I can see them without turning my head all the way to either side! I was SO ANGRY!!! I bet if the superior lady wasn’t in the back I would have passed.

    So then I had to wait like a week or something to go back and retake it. I had a normal test taker that time–phew. I seriously over-drama did the test. I practically turned my whole body to look at each mirror–even the rear view mirror. I over-did all the stops and everything else. I felt like an idiot, lol. But I passed! The whole thing had me SO mad though 😛 Texas DMV’s have got to be worse than other states!

  2. Wow! That was an incredibly stinky day! I’m so glad that Anxiety Girl used her secret powers, in whatever form they came, to overcome!

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