Going a week without the PC this time wasn’t too hard. Every night when Paul came home from work I could quickly check my email on his laptop. It wasn’t the same as turning to the computer every time I had a question, but it was so much easier than the weeks without internet when Earthlink was being such a pain. If I dare say, this week was very good for me.
As I came up for air after being so depressed this summer, there was a gradual, but unmistakable snap. The need to regain control is slowly seeping to every facet of my life. Finally, finally, I am taking control of my house. I no longer delude myself into thinking I’m going to get help, and I’ve found a few minutes every day to do some real work. Fall has always been my spring cleaning season, but this year I’m already more successful and purging, organizing, and sticking with it, than any other year. I’m sure it’s the cooler weather (it R-A-I-N-E-D last night!!!) combined with my need to organize. Most of it is behind-the-scenes kind of stuff, so some days the apartment appears worse instead of better, but I know what I’m doing, and I can see a difference.
The more I do the better I feel.
It’s fall. The weather is cooler so we can get out more, even though I haven’t yet solved my stroller dillemma. I want a jogger. My Dad has offered to buy me a stroller, but I just can’t say, “I found the one I want, please send me a cheque for $400 US, plus 8.5% tax plus shipping.” I’m hoping I can find a decent one on craigslist, my BIL did.
It’s fall. The sun doesn’t come so directly into the front of our apartment so I could try again to grow some plants, but I have finally embraced the climate and purchased some succulents. It was just too depressing to get attached to new growth only to see it fry out and die. Now, if I can’t keep the cacti alive then we’ll know it’s a problem with me. In the meantime I am hopeful and happy.
It’s fall. We’re all back from our family vacations and our kids are over the freak late-summer illnesses (ear infections, eye infections, croup, high fevers . . .) Yesterday was our first day of playgroup in two months. It felt so good to be out, playing with our friends. It felt normal. I felt normal.
Boy Blue can sit. He’s been doing so all month long. It’s very exciting because he feels big. I can put him down and he’ll play for half an hour. Little Red never let me walk away when he was little. Boy Blue’s disposition allows me to get things done around the house. It’s amazing that my house is cleaner than it was when I had only one.
It’s fall, and this is my first random post in months. I thought my brain was more collected but my week’s worth of thoughts came out in a jumble. I didn’t intend for this to be random post or even a brain dump. I have only one more thought to drop into this gurgling pensieve:
It’s fall. It’s one month till Hallowe’en and once again I’m idiotically deluded into thinking I’m going to make the costumes. I’m really struggling with the pattern for Little Red’s. This might just be the year we finally break down and purchase costumes. If any of you are especially brilliant in the sewing arts, please send me a note. I think if I just talk out my idea I can find a way to make it work.